Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
