"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
