I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
