all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize