I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize