If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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