Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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