i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize