he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize