Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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