She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
