Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize