Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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