Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
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