Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize