I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
