Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
