He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
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