yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
