Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
