Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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