I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
