she takes plan B like it's going out of style
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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