I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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