what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
