is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
