I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
