If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
