I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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