I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
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