Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
