Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
you had me at cake vodka
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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