Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
