so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
