plz talk dirty to me
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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