I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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