someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
