i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
