on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
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