i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
