i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
