Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Let the clothes fall where they may.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
