He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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