her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
