Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
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