His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Randomize
