She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
