We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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