I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
