The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize