stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
