I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
They are going to name an STD after you.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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