he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
