using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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