no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
