Is it normal to miss your booty call?
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
